Want, need, and desire are all similar concepts. For me I want a need to be desired. However, life has given me, well, not that. Yes, I have been desired, but not in the way that I wanted to be desired or needed to be. It’s funny actually. You think that you got what you want, need, and, yes, even desire, but that’s not at all what you have. I’ve never had that with anyone, and I have the odd feeling that I never will.
“I want a man that stands beside me, not in front of or behind me. Give me two arms that wanna hold me, not own me. And I’ll give all the love in my heart. Stand beside me. Be true don’t tell lies to me. I’m not looking for a fantasy. I wanna man that stands beside me…” Yes, I realize that I just put a nice, whee little quote from JoDee Messina‘s “Stand Beside Me”. But that is exactly what I want, what I need, what I desire. But no, life does not have that in store for me. Unless it happens while I’m on my little vacation back in my home town.
I haven’t been there for 3 years almost. And there is this guy. Oh, I know what you’re thinking. There is always a guy. There always has to be. But there is this guy. He has been a friend of mine for years and he is the one reading my story and letting me know what to edit, etc. And I really like this guy. I have for years, but we have never been able to get in a relationship with each other. He lives in there and I live here. We are roughly 4 hours apart from each other. But maybe he will see his ways and begin a long-distance relationship with me. But I highly doubt that. Because apparently long-distance relationships do not work at all. But a girl can dream, can’t she?
So here it is. A girl is going to dream the one thing she knows she can’t have: the guy she really likes, but who lives far away. She will just see how next weekend goes when she is on her vacation and she is going to let me know, so that I can tell the world for some odd reason. But that girl is going to dream, and continue to be the hopeless romantic that she is. Plain and simple.